Will an Alcohol Relapse Hurt those Around You?

One of the biggest fears amongst those who are attempting to recover from an alcohol addiction is the risk of hurting those around them. They do not want a relapse to cause people to pity them or feel as if they have failed them in some way. This applies to both family members and the people who they are trying to recover alongside.

In this article, we are going to discuss the issue of alcohol rehab and alcohol relapses. Let us take a closer look at it.

The General Perception

The general perception amongst people is that they are going to potentially affect their recovery partners if they fail. This is both a good thing and a bad thing. Firstly, it is thought that the fear of letting everyone else down will serve as some sort of motivator. The problem is if it does go wrong and the person relapses it could make them feel that much worse about it.

Staying Strong
Contrary to popular belief, it is not always the case that people will collapse alongside whoever has relapsed. Drug rehab breeds a culture of support. When someone fails, the chances are everyone else will close ranks and attempt to help the person. They will actually take their attention away from their cravings in order to help them. In other words, a slip here and there does not have to mean causing a significant amount of damage to others. It can actually make everyone else stronger.

Should You Tell Someone You Have Had a Relapse?

It is not uncommon to see people deciding to suffer in silence when they relapse. They do not want to go through what they see as the humiliation of telling their support group what has happened. The belief goes that they are doing a good thing by doing this. In reality, they are only reducing their chances of success in the future. By bottling up these feelings, it allows the negativity to grow. When people allow negative thoughts to fester, the chances of a further relapse increases.

Always seek professional help when experiencing a relapse. Yes, it will mean that other people will know about what’s happened, but that is not a bad thing. It is a good thing. Someone who can be honest with themselves and those around them is a strong individual. They can cope with the realities of their situation. Not being able to cope with what is going on is an example of what got the person stuck in an addiction rut in the first place.

You Are Not Responsible

Nobody should ever feel as if they are responsible for someone else’s recovery. This does not mean nobody should care about anyone else. It means if someone relapses,that is his or her problem. They did it to themselves. They have to take responsibility for their actions. Unless someone else tipped a bottle of beer down their throats, this was a decision they made.

One of the biggest mistakes any alcoholic can make outside of rehab clinics is to make themselves believe that their actions will affect upon another person’s recovery journey.

Middlegate have worked with hundreds of rehab clinics in the UK. Through their experiences, they can show you how to use alcohol rehab to turn your life around.


This article originally published at Middlegate.co.uk Blog here

Staying on Track While in Recovery

One of the biggest fears that a recovering addict will have is that he or she is going to relapse and end up back where they started. If you are a recovering addict, it is important to remember that, especially in the early days of recovery, addiction is an illness that affected you over an extended period of time. If you were drinking alcohol or using drugs for many years, then it is going to take a while for you to get better. Recovery does not happen overnight and you are bound to have periods where you experience intense cravings. However, you do not have to give in to those cravings and you do not have to have a slip-up. Relapse is not inevitable but it is also not uncommon. Many recovering addicts have had a slip-up before getting themselves back on track again.

Beware of Your Emotions

Certain emotions can lead to relapse, so you need to be on the lookout for them and how they make you feel. Dealing with your emotions as they arise is the best way to ensure that you do not give in to them. Fear is a common emotion, and it is a healthy one. If you were not afraid of relapse, then you would be in danger of succumbing to it. Nevertheless, if your fear begins to take over your life, you need to do something about it. You cannot let your fear prevent you from living; if you feel that your fear has become debilitating, you should speak to your counsellor or sponsor.

Resentment is another common emotion that can be hard to let go of. Many recovering addicts cling to their feelings of anger against others but this can prevent you from having true success. Whatever happened in the past should be left in the past. While some people may have hurt you, you have probably done your fair share of hurting too. Learn how to forgive and forget so that you can move on.

Move Forward
If you are feeling guilty about things you have done while you were addicted, this is normal. If you use that guilt to make amends, then this will improve your chances of a successful recovery. Nonetheless, do not dwell any longer than necessary on these feelings of guilt. Make amends to those you have hurt and then move on. Remember that you are not a bad person because you had an addiction. You did not choose to have an addiction, nor did you have any control over your actions when you were addicted.

Addiction affects the brain and changes the way it works. Alcoholics and drug addicts are people with illnesses. These chemical substances can impair the brain and affect behaviour and cause individuals to act in a way they never would when sober.

Telling Others

A primary concern for recovering addicts is whether or not they have to tell others that they are in recovery from addiction. It is natural to be embarrassed or ashamed about your addiction and you may not want to tell others. You do not have to tell everyone about your problems if you do not want to, but many recovering addicts feel that talking about it helps.

These days, there is not as much stigma attached to being an alcoholic or addict. People are more accepting about addiction and realise that it is an illness. It is entirely up to you, but you may be surprised at how understanding others will be. Most people these days know someone who has suffered from some type of addiction. Moreover, you may find that many already had their suspicions that you were suffering from an addiction.

Whatever you decide is your choice. You may not feel ready to talk now, but you may want to open up as time goes on and you feel stronger about your recovery.

This article originally published at middlegate.co.uk -   Alcohol Rehab Clinics Blog here

Is There a Difference Between Helping and Enabling?

If you are the parent of a child that has an addiction, you will probably want to do everything in your power to help. Even if that child is married with children of his or her own, you will still worry and will be devastated to see him or her struggling in this way. However, it is important to realise that there is a very fine line between helping and enabling.

Your child may have no money and no opportunity to get credit anymore, so you may be tempted to help out financially. You may have already been doing this for some time, but this is not always the best idea. The problem that many parents face is that they do not want to see their child struggling financially if they feel they can help. This is even more of an issue when children are involved.

Are You Enabling Your Child?

If you are giving your child financial help, you have to ask yourself whether or not this kind of help is allowing him or her to carry on with the addiction. You may have decided that instead of giving money to your child you will take care of their grocery shopping each week. This may sound the perfect solution because you will be providing your child and his or her family with essential items but you are not providing money that could be spent on the addiction.

Nevertheless, by taking care of this expense, you are giving your child the opportunity to spend money elsewhere. Instead of having to put money aside for groceries, your child can now spend that money on gambling, alcohol, drugs or whatever it is that he or she is addicted to.

It would be far better to do things such as offer lifts to meetings if needed or take care of their kids when necessary. You can also help him or her to manage the money coming in and going out of the home so that the family can get back on track financially. And offering support throughout drug and/or alcohol rehab and recovery is another way to help.

Being Cruel to be Kind

The important thing to remember as a parent of an addict is that your child needs to learn how to stand on his or her own two feet. While your natural instincts may be to help, you may be doing more harm than good by doing so.

You might feel guilty for taking a step back but, in most instances, this is the best way to handle the situation. Let him or her start taking care of managing the issue of recovery. Do what you can to get your child to accept that help is needed, and help find the best treatment centre for this. Nonetheless, once his or her treatment has started, it is a good idea to let him or her manage it. The more you do for your child, the less he or she will do.

It is tough for parents to take a step back and to see their child struggling, but in many cases, this ‘cruel to be kind’ approach will work and will encourage your child to take control of his or her life again.

Make Treatment a Condition of Help

If you want your child to get help for addiction, you can help but you should make sure that he or she understands that you expect some guarantee on their part. You should make a commitment to treatment a condition of any help you offer, and instantly stop helping if your child decides to stop attending meetings or going to counselling sessions. Make sure that help is not something that could enable his or her addiction.

This article originally published at middlegate.co.uk -  Rehab Clinics Blog here
https://www.middlegate.co.uk/is-there-a-difference-between-helping-and-enabling/

Are You Scared of Facing Rehab?

You may have been struggling with addiction for many years and have spent much of that time either denying you had a problem or downplaying the severity of it. Most addicts will do this at some stage during their addiction. It may be because they genuinely do not think they have an addiction or because they do not want to have to give up the chemical or activity to which they are addicted.

However, what once made the addicted individual feel good has no doubt become a huge problem in his or her life. Most people begin taking a specific substance or engaging in a particular activity because they think it makes them feel better about their life. However, after a while this substance or activity will take over and will cause more problems for them. There will come a time when they finally realise that they need to stop taking drugs, drinking alcohol or gambling (or whatever else it is this person is addicted to). They will finally accept that they need help because their addiction is negatively affecting them and the people they love.

If you are one such person and you have agreed to get help for your addiction, then a programme of rehabilitation may be on the cards. You may be excited at the prospect of getting help for your addiction but you may also be feeling apprehensive or worried. You may even be a little bit scared of what is ahead.

Fear is Natural

It is natural to feel scared about something new and you may be worried about being away from home and work or leaving your family behind. You may not like the idea of having to spend time in a rehabilitation facility and feeling as though you cannot leave. However, look at it this way – if you suffered a heart attack, for example, you would be taken to hospital without question. You would be leaving your home, work and family behind in order to get better. You would not think twice about it in this situation, as you would understand that being away was the best chance of saving your life.

Your addiction is a serious illness that needs treatment. In the same way that being in hospital could save your life after a heart attack, a rehabilitation centre could save your life – if you do not get treatment for your addiction, you could die.

Think of the Positives

The worst that could happen in a rehabilitation centre is that you could be lonely or that everyone will find out you are an addict. Nevertheless, if you do not go, your addiction will undoubtedly get worse and everyone will find out regardless.

You are unlikely to be lonely in rehab. You may not be with your family all day but you will meet new people and will learn to live without the substance or activity that has been controlling your life for so long. This means that when you do return to your family, you can start a new, fulfilling life together.

Rehab is your chance to get your life back on track and to do something positive. No matter how scared you are feeling right now, by taking a step towards recovery, you will soon lose those fears. As you begin your treatment, you will slowly lose your fears and will start to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

You will see how it is possible to overcome your addiction and to live a life free from chemicals. As you learn more about addiction and how it affects you, you will become more powerful and will know that you can live a long and happy life with those you love. Fear of rehab is natural but it should not be allowed to prevent you from beating your addiction and getting better.

This article originally published at middlegate.co.uk – Rehab Clinics Blog here

The Tragedy of Alcoholism

Most people have a personal perception of what an alcoholic looks like. Those with no experience of this devastating illness imagine alcoholics to be individuals who spend all day long drinking. They may believe that those suffering from alcoholism live on the streets and have no job, but this is far from the norm. The truth is that alcoholism is an illness that affects far more people than most would imagine.

In reality, many individuals around the country are living with this illness everyday but, to everybody else, they look like they have everything. High-functioning addicts can appear to all the world as if they have their life in order, but behind closed doors they struggle to cope.

Hidden Addiction

Rachael Lander, an award-winning cellist from South London, is an example of a high-functioning addict who hid her addiction from those around her. She has now revealed how she was taking bottles of what looked like water on stage with her when she performed. The bottles actually contained vodka, which she was drinking while playing with a professional orchestra. During breaks in her performance in top venues such as The Royal Albert Hall, Rachael would sip on vodka from her ‘water’ bottle.

She said, “I would think ‘I just have to get through to that sip’, that was how I was living. I spent a lot of time in the public toilets of supermarkets putting own brand supermarket vodka into water bottles and then wrapping the glass bottle and putting it in the Tampax bin quietly.”

Excuses

Rachael, like most other alcoholics, found excuses and reasons for her addiction to alcohol and blamed her high-pressured career. She developed a love for the cello at the age of eight and admits she worked really hard to become the best cellist she could possibly be. She said “Sometimes I think it was my first addiction, it gave me an escape from myself.”

As Rachael’s career developed and she began playing in front of large audiences, she started to feel nauseous and anxious. She continued, “When I was sitting in orchestra sections my heart would start beating and I could feel adrenaline like a chemical. I was really conscious of the fact there was lots of people there looking at me and I had to keep my s**t together otherwise everyone would know.”

Heartbreak

Rachael admits that heartbreak at the age of seventeen led her to realise that alcohol could take the edge off her feelings of anxiety and fear. She said, “I thought, ‘hello that’s it’; from that minute the link had been made in my head, you don’t have to take it anymore, you can feel like this, I used to take it like medicine.”

She began taking vodka with her to calm her nerves and, as she puts it, ‘be able to function’. Nevertheless, this soon led to her drinking throughout the day without realising she had a problem. She said that one of the biggest tragedies surrounding alcoholism is that the person affected tends to be the only one who doesn’t realise they have the issue.

Rachael is not the first alcoholic to self-medicate with alcohol or to be oblivious to the fact that she even had a problem. And, unfortunately, she will not be the last. These are common traits among those affected by alcoholism, but the good news is that help is available through alcohol rehabs and addiction advice organisations.

Middlegate is currently working with people affected by all types of addiction. If you or someone you love needs help for an addiction, you can contact us here at Middlegate today. We will provide you with information and can answer any questions you may have.


Source: https://www.middlegate.co.uk/the-tragedy-of-alcoholism/

How to Avoid Temptations When Not at Home

If you are learning to live a sober life after a programme of recovery, then you will have to change certain things about your lifestyle. You may have to stop socialising with certain people as well as change the places you frequent. However, what happens when you are away from the security and comfort of your home? How will you cope with temptations when you are away?

Away from Home

If you are travelling for business or pleasure, it may not be as easy to stay on the straight and narrow. Travelling alone makes it very easy to think that you could have one or two drinks, and nobody would know. It is easy to let your guard down when you are away from home and your support network. It is, therefore, crucial that you plan ahead and prepare before you leave home so that you do not end up back where you started.

Before you head away, check out the nearest fellowship meeting to where you will be staying. If you are worried that you may fall off the wagon while away, take a sober companion with you. If you cannot do this, then make a point of letting colleagues know that you will not be drinking. If you do not want to tell them you are in recovery, say you cannot drink for medical reasons.

Flying in Recovery

Flying can be tough for many individuals, and a vast majority of people will try to calm their flying fears by drinking alcohol. Those in recovery cannot do this, so it can be a struggle for those who are afraid of flying. There is also the worry that the person next to you will be drinking. If you are flying alone, you have no control over who sits beside you and you cannot stop them from having an alcoholic drink if they want to.

If you do find yourself sitting beside someone who is drinking and there is no possibility of switching seat, you should close your eyes and zone out. Meditate, watch a film or listen to music to help you forget about the fact that you cannot drink.

Coping with Temptations

Below are a few examples of ways to deal with temptations when not at home:

1. If you are finding it tough while away from home, contact your sponsor or someone you can talk to about your feelings. This may be a close family member or friend who will be able to get you through this tough

2. Take some literature with you that you can read when you are feeling particularly low – you may be surprised at how much this helps. Also, practice any meditation techniques you have learned to help you to move past these feelings.

3. Remember why you wanted to get sober in the first place and what it was like during the darkest periods of your life before alcohol rehab. It is easy to fall back into the old ways if you begin to glamorise your drinking or drug-taking past. Instead, think of all the good things in your life and remind yourself of what you could lose if you succumb to drinking or drug-taking again.

4. Find something to do that does not involve drinking. No matter where you are in the world, you should be able to find some activities that should take your mind off any cravings you may be experiencing. Ideally, you should research these before you leave home so that you know what opportunities you will have for sober activities should you need them.

5. Go for a walk or find a local gym or leisure centre where you can do a workout.

Source: https://www.middlegate.co.uk/how-to-avoid-temptations-when-not-at-home/